James Bond’s Tooth Trauma

http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/jun2009/4/2/daniel-craig-pic-rex-728763664.jpgJames Bond’s Tooth Trauma

20 February 2006

We were so traumatized by the sight of the horrific duo
formed by James Bond Casting Mistakes Daniel Craig
and Eva Green that we couldn’t get back to this blog for
2 days. But we’re feeling better now, especially since
we’ve received good news from Prague, where shooting
for Fiasco Royale is well under way:

New James Bond star Daniel Craig was left toothless and
bleeding when a fight scene for upcoming movie Casino Royale
went horribly wrong. […] An insider says, “Daniel was filming
with some minor actors when he got hit in the face.

“He was reeling from a heavy blow and staggered back holding
his face.

“He put his hand to his mouth but the blood started to seep
through his fingers – it was horrible.”

We were going to leave out the gory details but after
submitting you to their pictures, we thought you’d be
able to handle just about anything Daniel Craig and his
female co-star had in store for you, including, but not
limited to, how Bond’s new fighting skills and love
interest make you doubt his sexuality.

Following the unfortunate incident, production for the
21st James Bond has been suspended for 2 weeks until
Czech doctors perform a tooth transplant on Craig, a
move made necessary by the fact that “wone, yames
wone” dones not have the same cachet as “Bond, James
Bond.” In related news, the stuntman who
inadvertently broke Craig’s teeth was suspended after a
video tape was anonymously sent to Eon Productions
who oversees the 007 franchise. The tape features a
disheveled and inebriated Pierce Brosnan giving the
stuntman one of his James Bond Omega watches and
yelling “Good work, son! That should make these
fuckin’ bastards crawl back to me!” followed by a
maniacal laugh and a loud thud as Brosnan hits the
ground, bottom first.

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