No Time To Digest: Part 4, Temper Raising Titles

Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?

As the train carrying a forlorn Madeline Swann pulls away the screen begins to morph and colorful dots start to materialize… Wait there’s something familiar about this…

Where have I seen this before?!

Wait a minute!…

NO! Dr. NO, PLEASE GOD NOOOO!

Oh Yes! They are so bankrupt of ideas they started ripping off the title scenes of previous films! But can you really blame them? They need something to grab the audience’s attention, cuz the soft airy dirge playing in the background ain’t gonna do it!

Was that a wispy breeze? No, that was the No Time To Die theme song!

After the shameless Dr. No rip off we get images of a woman trapped under ice and a statue of a Britannia holding a trident under water…

…the trident imagery will come up in the final set piece, as it represents the Craig-Bond on Q’s mission tracking “radar.”

As has been the case since Skyfall the images pretty much tell the tail of the film. After the statue dissolves we find ourselves within the inner workings of an Omega™ watch, second hands ticking past one another with figures reaching out and just missing each other.

How existential!

A DB5 falls into the sand, just like Bond’s had his dick knocked in the dirt for the past decade plus. A wrecking ball sweeps by showing us the Britannia statue from earlier is caught in the sand and begins to sink.

Guess what that sand is in?!

If you said an hourglass congratulations, you stated the obvious!

Bloody hell, how clichĂ© can you get, with time in the title, the ideas of lost time, lovers who’ve run out of time and of course the On Her Majesty’s Secret Service larceny!

Not to mention the true source material!

DNA strands fly by followed with an extreme closeup of a woman rubbing her fingers across her pregnant stomach. Noh masks appear and explode, followed by a chocolate bunny sculpture of the Craig-Bond holding a white chocolate PPK which also explodes.

Subtle! It’s fitting how all the cooks who spoiled this broth are listed at this point!

Production meeting at EON.

A scuba diver swims past the broken Britannia and a sunken PPK for some reason, despite there being absolutely no scuba diving in this film, so obviously a cheap Thunderball pilfering! The images morph into the side of a glass structure thus beginning the next scene.

I’ll leave it here, until we pick it up next time in: The Limburger Kidnapping.

 

 

 

 

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