James Bond’s Obituary

 

The Times
Commander James Bond,
C.M.G., R.N.V.R.

M. writes:–

As your readers will have learned from earlier issues, a senior officer of the Ministry of Defence, Commander James Bond, C.M.G., R.N.V.R., is missing, believed killed, while on an official mission to Japan. It grieves me to have to report that hopes of his survival must now be abandoned. It therefore falls to my lot, as the Head of the Department he served so well, to give some account of this officer and of his outstanding services to his country.

James Bond was born of a Scottish father, Andrew Bond of Glencoe, and a Swiss mother, Monique Delacroix, from the Canton de Vaud. His father being a foreign representative of the Vickers armaments firm, his early education, from which he inherited a first-class command of French and German, was entirely abroad. When he was eleven years of age, both his parents were killed in a climbing accident in the Aiguilles Rouges above Chamonix, and the youth came under the guardianship of an aunt, since deceased, Miss Charmian Bond, and went to live with her at the quaintly-named hamlet of Pett Bottom near Canterbury in Kent. There, in a small cottage hard by the attractive Duck Inn, his aunt, who must have been a most erudite and accomplished lady, completed his education for an English public school, and, at the age of twelve or thereabouts, he passed satisfactorily into Eton, for which College he had been entered at his birth by his father. It must be admitted that his career at Eton was brief and undistinguished and, after only two halves, as a result, it pains me to record, of some alleged trouble with one of the boys’ maids, his aunt was requested to remove him. She managed to obtain his transfer to Fettes, his father’s old school. Here the atmosphere was somewhat Calvinistic, and both academic and athletic standards were rigourous. Nevertheless, though inclined to be solitary by nature, he established some firm friendships among the traditionally famous athletic circles at the school. By the time he left, at the early age of seventeen, he had twice fought for the school as a light-weight and had, in addition, founded the first serious judo class at a British public school. By now it was 1941 and, by claiming an age of nineteen and with the help of an old Vickers colleague of his father, he entered a branch of what was subsequently to become the Ministry of Defence. To serve the confidential nature of his duties, he was accorded the rank of lieutenant in the Special Branch of the R.N.V.R., and it is a measure of the satisfaction his services gave to his superiors that he ended the war with the rank of Commander. It was about this time that the writer became associated with certain aspects of the Ministry’s work, and it was with much gratification that I accepted Commander Bond’s post-war application to continue working for the Ministry in which, at the time of his lamented disappearance, he had risen to the rank of Principal Officer in the Civil Service.

The nature of Commander Bond’s duties with the Ministry, which were, incidentally, recognized by the appointment of C.M.G. in 1954, must remain confidential, nay secret, but his colleagues at the Ministry will allow that he performed them with outstanding bravery and distinction, although occasionally, through an impetuous strain in his nature, with a streak of the foolhardy that brought him in conflict with higher authority. But he possessed what almost amounted to “The Nelson Touch” in moments of the highest emergency, and he somehow contrived to escape more or less unscathed from the many adventurous paths down which his duties led him. The inevitable publicity, particularly in the foreign press, accorded some of these adventures, made him, much against his will, something of a public figure, with the inevitable result that a series of popular books came to be written around him by a personal friend and former colleague of James Bond. If the quality of these books, or their degree of veracity, had been any higher, the author would certainly have been prosecuted under the Official Secrets Act. It is a measure of the disdain in which these fictions are held at the Ministry, that action has not yet — I emphasize the qualification — been taken against the author and publisher of these high-flown and romanticized caricatures of episodes in the career of a outstanding public servant.

It only remains to conclude this brief in memoriam by assuring his friends that Commander Bond’s last mission was one of supreme importance to the State. Although it now appears that, alas, he will not return from it, I have the authority of the highest quarters in the land to confirm that the mission proved to be one hundred per cent successful. It is no exaggeration to pronounce unequivocally that, through the recent valorous efforts of this one man, the Safety of the Realm has received mighty reassurance.

James Bond was briefly married in 1962, to Teresa, only daughter of Marc-Ange Draco, of Marseilles. The marriage ended in tragic circumstances that were reported in the press at the time. There was no issue of the marriage and James Bond leaves, so far as I am aware, no relative living.

M.G. writes:
I was happy and proud to serve Commander Bond in a close capacity during the past threeyears at the Ministry of Defence. If our fears for him are justified, may I suggest these simple words for his epitaph? Many of the junior staff here feel they represent his philosophy:

“I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.”

 

** You Only Live Twice, Chapter 21 “Obit:” -By Ian Fleming

  5 comments for “James Bond’s Obituary

    • Wow, the “R-word” how enlightened you must be! About as enlightened as you are creative judging by your clever account name I’d say.

  1. I think ever since Craig became Bond it’s gone dramatically down hill. Whilst I realise my 3rd favourite Bond (Pierce Brosnan) is perhaps more nostalgia of the Bond I grew up with I still think he had more charisma and wasn’t the wooden statue that Daniel Craig is. I never understood this ‘lets make Bond more gritty’ when there are many movie that do this a lot more effectively. If I want grit I’ll go and see Bourne or The Equalizer, going against the traditional Flemming was in my opinion one of the worst ideas they had. Just incase others don’t know how No Time To Die ends I won’t reveal it here. But I think it was idiotic, no Bond actor is more important than the last, they very lucky to be guardians to the role maintaining it until they need to pass the baton to the next actor. I don’t buy the argument ‘there can be unlimited versions of Bond in different universes’ I think it goes against the original character.

  2. I prefer darker bonds in line with Ian Flemings. I grew up with Connery he was my no 1 but I have to admit he is level 1= with Daniel Craig. My no 3 is Timothy Dalton. Roger Moore is NOT James Bond he is Simon Templar. Pierce Brosnan is NOT James Bond He is Remmington Steele. George Lazenby had a mercurial career 1 Bond Film and Not much more, in fact I can’t think of anything else he has done. My wife had never seen a James Bond Film until me met. Her Bond is DC and she has loved most of his films not Quantum of Solice or SPECTRE. Bond’s decision at the end of No Time To Die Must resonate with husbands and fathers everywhere. My son once asked me if I loved him enough to die for him. I told him no I loved him enough to kill for him and keep killing until him his sister and mum were safe. I guess that makes me a ‘mysogenistic cold War dinosaur’. Possibly because my father and mentor was a Royal Navy Vet having served in WW2 and Korea.
    Finally Daniel Craig may not be James Bond 007 but as a Yorkshire man he’ll do for me.

  3. As I read in other comment, Roger Moore is not James Bond: he is Simon Templar; Pierce Brosnan is not James Bond: he is Remmington Steele. Long life to Daniel Craig: the guy that had at least two movies (Casino Royale and Skyfall) that felt like true epic stories (as From Russia With Love) rather than everyday action films. Ok, I like The Spy Who Loved Me and Goldeneye, but they are not in the same league as Craig’s and Connery’s top films.

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