Property Of A Sad Lady

From my cold dead hands!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

According to this articleĀ Barbara Broccoli is a rather forlorn woman.Ā It seems the prospect of Ms Babz losing her favorite boy toy has her lamenting in abject misery. Quote:

Broccoli told Variety: ā€œIā€™m in total denial.

ā€œIā€™ve accepted what Daniel has said, but Iā€™m still in denial. Itā€™s too traumatic for me.ā€

Traumatic?! I hope you have your emotional support animal close at hand!

Stamped and filed!

 

Traumatic? You knew this day would come didn’t you? Sooner or later this craggy old man would have to shuffle off this cinematic coil for greener pastures, to be replaced with a younger, newer model right? She goes on:

ā€œItā€™s pretty devastating.

ā€œ[And] if he hadnā€™t come back [for No Time To Die], I was gonna go put a duvet on my head and cry for three years.ā€

Madam producer, you’re a woman of nearly 60 years young who proclaims herself a massive feminist. A woman who rules her production company with an iron fist, yet here you are bemoaning the loss of your silver screen crush like at 12 year old girl! Look, personally I don’t care if you want to be a woman of steel who drives your enemies before you, or take the persona of a prepubescent “tweenager” who frets over her monthly copy of Tiger Beat magazine, but you must pick one or the other!

He is indeed the ginchiest!

 

Stop crying over the spilled milk of Daniel Craig, put on your big woman pants and get down to business, that is if you are in fact a real force to be reckoned with in the film industry. If you are not, then go back to sucking your thumb under that duvet and stop proclaiming yourself a strong independent woman, because not only are you making yourself out to be a fool, but you’re also setting back the feminist movement you claim to love so much, by 30 years every time you make with the cutesy love struck little girl act!

Why can’t Craig stay Bond FOREVAAAAA!

 

As to Craig’s decision to return for this film, he says:

ā€œAnd then she was just persistent and came to me with some ideas, which we started formulating, and I got excited again.ā€

I’ve got an inclination as to what those “ideas” were ($$$$$$$$).

Oh yes Babz, those trulyĀ are some very big, exciting ideas!

 

Then we have this articleĀ entitled,Ā ā€˜No Time to Dieā€™: A Rare In-Depth Interview With the Keepers of James Bond.Ā A rare interview indeed, so rare I doubt it ever happened. This article is so derivative of so many other interviews given by EON over the last decade, I have to wonder if the production company just hands out the same talking points year after year, or if this author went back through the archives and picked apart previous essays to build this Frankenstein’s monster of an article.

This was an article several other articles in the making.

 

Anyone who’s kept even a half blind eye on the goings on at EON will recognize this content from other write-ups over the years. It’s not so much an interview with the two producers but rather a history of their involvement in Bond films, along with interviews from others incidental to the productions, current and former directors, writers, and Danny himself, but very little from Babz or her doddering older half brother Michael G. Wilson.

A rather light read.

 

There are however, a few points of interest, first:

Craigā€™s selection was considered to be such an affront to 007 purists that websites, dubbed CraigNotBond, sprang up to decry his casting.

Thanks for the free advertising fella!

Thank-sh, thank-sh a lot!

It’s the darndest thing, almost every time I turn around it feels like there’s another EON authorized puff piece mentioning this site.Ā I presume they’re doing this as some sort of tease at us, as if to say, “look at us, Craig is still Bond aren’t we so smart!”

The classy version!

 

However the joke’s on EON. It’s nothing but free advertising for this site, in fact it’s how I discovered it way back in 2012, when EON plastered this site full screen in the documentary Everything Or Nothing.Ā So I suppose you could say EON themselves created this incarnation of the monster!

We are very much alive and well!!!

 

And when you consider the pro-Craig sites are getting no mention in the media, I’d say we’re doing pretty good!

I’m sorry old boy, but nobody’s interested in your underwear fetish.

 

Next thing from this article;

Already, the media has begun speculating about who could step into Bondā€™s impeccably tailored tuxedo

That’s very true, everyone is looking past No Time To Die to whomever is going to replace Craig, nobody cares about him anymore. Whether you loved him or hated him you have to admit he’s well past his sell by date. As I said in this rantĀ back in the summer of 2017, bringing back Craig would be a let down and bad business. This film would be nothing but wall to wall free positive advertising, discussing the thrill of a new actor. Instead we get either vacuous puff pieces written by EON themselves or ad nauseam discussion over tampons and female “007.”

Garnering more buzz than the current production!

 

Speaking of “female Bond” we get this:

ā€œHe can be of any color, but he is male,ā€ says Broccoli. ā€œI believe we should be creating new characters for women ā€” strong female characters. Iā€™m not particularly interested in taking a male character and having a woman play it. I think women are far more interesting than that.ā€

The ironic side effect of that statement has been the return of the politically charged entertainment pundits to further their combat in trench warfare. The irony comes in the fact these combatants have switched trenches! The he-man woman haters who were so incensed at Babz over “female 007” are now defending her over these comments and the blue haired shrieking banshees who were all a titter that there will “finally be a female Bond” as if anyone were asking for that, are now burning Babz in effigy.

BOO, down with Barbara Broccoli and “female 007!”

Huzzah! Long live the queen!

 

But here’s the thing, Babz initially said that very thing over a year ago! Here’sĀ my take from October of 2018, discussing her original statement. As I said before concerning these non Bond fans they only pop up to score points on each other in the battle for political supremacy and don’t give a toss the rest of the time. If they were paying any sort of attention to the overall comings and goings of Bond they’d already be aware of Babz’ comments and wouldn’t be making fools of themselves now!

Keeping a sharp eye on what happens with the Bond franchise!

 

I’ll leave you with a few more of Babz’ words lionizing her crush as “Da Bestus Eva!” Stating:

ā€œHe brought flesh and blood to the character,ā€

Ah yes! There was no Bond before Craig, he is the one to have created the character and given life to the role! Every actor from Connery to Brosnan were just frauds. If you believe that you are not a Bond fan, but rather a Craig fan. Hey there’s no shame in that, enjoy what you like, but you must recognize the truth.

Babz continues:

ā€œBond in the novel is a silhouette. Daniel has given him depth and an inner life. We were looking for a 21st-century hero, and thatā€™s what he delivered. He bleeds; he cries; heā€™s very contemporary.ā€

So now apparently Craig is no longer Fleming’s Bond?! I afraid I’m a bit confused, wasn’t it madam Babz who declared endlessly since Craig’s casting that it was he and only he who could embody the intricacies of Fleming’s elaborate character. However, according to the perpetually 12 year old Teen BeatĀ fan, now Fleming’s masterwork was nothing but an empty husk and the mythical Craig was able to swoop in and create from whole cloth a hero for all millennia. So all of you Craig apologists stop repeating the previous company line, namely Craig is the truest and closest to the Bond of the novels, since now according to your queen that is no longer the case.

I hereby decree Daniel Craig is the epitome of Craig’s Bond, death to Fleming’s Bond, huzzah!

  8 comments for “Property Of A Sad Lady

  1. I don’t get Barbara’s comment “Daniel has given him depth and an inner life”. Sure, Bond as played by Craig looks more angry and incensed than his predecessors for longer periods but does mean “depth”?

    It sounds like Barbara wants the Bond series to win a BAFTA award.

    • Yeah Gareth, I have to wonder if the folks at EON actually believe their B.S. or if they think the public are just dumb enough to be convinced of it. Perhaps a bit of both.

      As to the BAFTAs, I’m sure they’ll walk away with an armful as they always do, for better or worse Bond is a British institution so they get a free pass regardless of quality.

  2. For me it is telling how many non EON Sponsored entertainment news stores are speculation on the next James Bond. The audience was ready For a new bond in 2012- 2013, then again 2015-16, Babs is stuck in 2005 where she had to fight the studios, directors, fans and her own brother to hire Craig, she is stuck on that battle where she used her contractual rights to hire Bond, the studio partner is supposed to have a say over other aspects but the Broccoli family has final say over bond.

    Their narrative evolved to say Craig fleshed out
    a character hardly there in the pages of Ian Flemingā€™s books, I think you could argue this about the movies more. Connery, Moore and Brosnan mentioned not having a say in the character, and feeling like a just a guy in a tux/suit in most scenes.
    Timothy Dalton got a lot more say and used it be truer to Ian Flemingā€™s bond.

  3. To your first point Omega, you’re absolutely right, Babz and especially Craig’s fans are stuck in the mid 00’s. Yes, Casino Royale was a marvelous film, but that was a decade and a half ago and the films since don’t stand up.

    And to your second point, Craig has fallen into a deeper and deeper sleep with each successive film, not that he was all that bright eyed and bushy tailed in the first, yet we are meant to believe he is this thespianic powerhouse to have graced this franchise with his acting prowess, just because he was given a free hand to bloat the series with melodrama and story “twists” that would leave M. Night Shyamalan retching in disgust.

  4. I was at a super bowl party and everyone except me really wants to see this movie. I was like ā€œ really? Fake Bond!!ā€ I thought Moore stayed a bit too long but Mooreā€™s portrayal was better than any of Craigā€™s ā€œ depthā€ whatever that means.

    • Yes Janna, Moore did stay too long but at least he was having fun doing it. Dan is just marking time and counting money until he can finally be rid of the role he hates to play so much!

  5. To be honest, the supposed “greater emotional depth” of the Craig films has always struck me as somewhat false, stilted and unconvincing anyway.
    By contrast, the romance between Bond and Tracey in “On Her Majesty’s Secret Service” comes across as warm and believable, mostly due to the presence of a talented and well loved actress.
    And, of course, no crappy identity politics agenda to weigh proceedings down.
    I am genuinely fascinated to see how well (or not) this film performs at the box office….

    • You’re absolutely right Vin, it is ironic how the Craig era has tried as it might to wrap itself in emotion with each successive film, yet come off as more stiff and wooden than the one before. I suppose it’s all that great acting Dan is known for.
      I too am interested to see how this picture does at the box office, no matter how good it may be (and that is a huge maybe!) with all this talk of tampons and “female 007” dousing any excitement like an arctic cold wet blanket it’s sure to under perform.

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