Category: James bond

Pumping Iron and Other Substances

Daniel Craig fresh from working out on set. Sorry this gag never gets old, unlike Craig.     EON released the preceding photo on their Twitter account a few days ago, I’m assuming to assure everyone Dan hasn’t fallen off his special muscle “supplements.” Unfortunately all it did was bring this image to mind.  …

Ruled By an Iron Fist in an Iron Glove Wielded By an Iron Lady?

Barbara “Babbzy” Broccoli, yes she actually calls herself that folks. Check this email she sent in 2014 to Sony head Amy Pascal, wherein she infers Jamaica is a dangerous “shit hole” to paraphrase a certain embattled American politician and note Babbz’ email address. . This is a woman who egotistically states she rules her production company…

Fresh Face or Mo Money Mo Problems

 Daniel Craig’s much younger replacement?     Bond has gone under many different incarnations since his big screen debut in 1962, an enduring series that has seen six different starring actors. The irony is when Connery left the series everyone thought it was dead, when in fact it was what helped keep it going. Had…

Break A Leg (and other odds and ends)

May 15, 2019, a profound historic event was reported on all the major news wires, namely that Daniel Craig fell down and went boom. Thankfully it appears Dan wasn’t badly injured, depending on who you ask, he’ll be returning after a one to two week recovery, so I can joke, but it serves as an…

Bohemian Travesty

Is EON grooming Rami Malek to play Howard the Duck in an Oscar bait biopic about the titular mallard?!   In the recent press junket (emphasis junk) the cast for the as yet unnamed Bond 25 was confirmed. I wonder why not just stick with “Bond 25” as the title? It has just as much…

The Plot Thickens?

Daniel Craig appearing in EON’s bizarre suicide prevention/pharmaceutical advert promotional campaign.     This is the official synopsis of the forthcoming Bond 25:   “Bond has left active service and is enjoying a tranquil life in Jamaica. His peace is short-lived when his old friend Felix Leiter from the CIA turns up asking for help.…

SHATTERCLIPSE: Apropos of Nothing

A copy of the Bond 25 script acquired at high cost of lives and money for you the reader!     Dateline, April 25, 2019, EON Productions interrupts your busy day to hold a press conference for Bond 25 in order to inform you nothing is happening! Yes you read that right EON’s coterie of…

Connery and Craig A Tale of Two Uncouth Actors

Previously I wrote about two different love scenes, one from Goldfinger and the other from SPECTRE. I thought this time I would take a look at the two actors in those scenes, because on the surface they appear quite similar. They both came from humble roots, Connery from the rough and tumble streets of Edinburgh,…

A Horse by Committee

The old saying goes, a camel is a horse designed by committee. Another saying is, too many cooks spoil the broth; well it seems EON has brought in another cook to work on the chaos soup that is Bond 25. That chef’s name is Phoebe Waller-Bridge; apparently Ms. Bridge was brought in at Craig’s insistence.…

The Spy Who Loved Her (whether she liked it or not)

Connery’s Bond has been accused in the past of being a bit “rapey”, most point to his seduction of Honor Blackman’s Pussy Galore in Goldfinger as the ultimate example. Let’s take a look at that scene and compare it to another more contemporary love scene. After Bond is found under Goldfinger’s model, the nefarious bullion…

Without Russia From Love

  As we await the run up to the pre-production of Bond 25, I thought we could take a look back to a statement made by Michael G. Wilson’s son Greg concerning the direction of the series. The younger Wilson said after the release of SPECTRE: “We’ve just begun to doodle with ideas for the…

Austin Powers Shagged Us!

  The title to this rant is a reference to something Craig said a while ago concerning the darker direction his films took compared to his predecessors. Of course Craig’s quote was far cruder, containing his obligatory F-bomb, but what else would you expect from a man who looks like a longshoreman? His implication is…

Brosnan’s Royale?

  After re-reading Casino Royale recently I wondered what if Brosnan had been given Fleming’s final unfilmed property as his swan song, instead of the overly bloated Die Another day. Or at the very least had they put that property in their pocket and waited until Craig had established a few missions under his belt…

Barbara Takes A Stand

    The “woke” militias of the Hollywood Illuminati have been beating the battle drums for a female Bond more and more recently. Even British Prime Minister Theresa May waded in to the fray to demand a lady Bond. Well, I’m happy to say Barbara Broccoli has finally put all this nonsense to bed by…

Cash King Craig

  I’ve seen many a pundit point to the box office take of Craig’s films as evidence of his greatness in the role. Far too many of whom thrust forward the unadjusted figures proclaiming him the “Highest Grossing Bond of all time and therefore the best!” And that statement is true; in that Craig is…

Will James Bond Return?

  From the first time cinematic Bond stepped off the silver screen in Dr. No right up to today the phrase “James Bond Will Return” appeared at the close of the ending credits. However, now thanks to the latest internet rumors that slogan could be in jeopardy. According to the internet Barbara Broccoli, Daniel Craig…

#EtTu, Bond?

  Recently the question has been asked how will Bond navigate the new #metoo era, the answer should be, in the same way he navigated every other social change, by being a constant in an ever changing world of upheaval. When the hippies hit the scene in the late sixties did Connery’s Bond don a…

Fans of Mediocrity Rejoice!

  Well its official Daniel Craig has slashed his wrists, at least metaphorically speaking. Craig claims he “changed his mind” concerning his return to Bond. Not true, everyone forgets the entire quote. Craig said, “Now? I’d rather break this glass and slash my wrists… If I did another Bond movie, it would only be for…